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Martha Fuckers
Last time we spoke I was at the airport waiting for a plane to Boston where I then met Kedrin and my mother, took the Peter Pan bus 1.5 hours to Wood’s Hole and then a ferry to our final destination...
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SHOP TALK: gchatting at work
Alexander: oh hunny my friends and my roomie are in nyc now for cmj maybe you should go to one of their shows and meet them! spencer is a nice cutie patootie too and the only single one. me: oh shit...
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Beauty and Dis Bish
Okay so before I start rambling on about the exciting/exhausting events surrounding my social life, I thought I’d explore a different facet of my routine that is becoming more and more relevant, HaIr...
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Thru the eyes of Sass
When you move to New York in the summer, it feels like a vacation for the first few months. The vibes are fancy and free. Your delusions are at their most vital. Your perspective shifts with the onset...
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Frankenshit
Now usually I don’t do this but uh…(smoke inside, that is. but everyone else does it here and it’s THE WEEKEND and I’m by myself on my computer so…party. Also I spent the whole day doing yoga and...
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I wanna dank u
Not to shatter the illusion or anything, but I actually have a pretty simple life about half the time. I get pretty turned on by domesticity, not because I feel somehow destined for it as a woman...
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holidays on xxx
A good friend of mine said recently that December is the Sunday of the year, which might explain why in the few weeks after Thanksgiving I’d been feeling a strange combination of lethargic and...
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Dead at ’13
You all know I love to complain. It’s partly because I am a loud, bratty perfectionist incapable of being satisfied and partly because I enjoy finding the humor in my misfortune and sharing that humor...
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Winter Bummerland
After I died from a sinus infection and came back to life just like Jesus herself, I decided to put my clean bill of health to use by moping. Every year around this time the whole world starts...
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Maui Me (lol i suck)
Oh. Valentine’s day happened? I guess one of my favorite things about being a depressed, pathetic single person is the freedom to make your own holidays and never buy gifts for anyone but yourself....
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reading the signs
I have officially been wearing the same clothes for two days and I smell like chicken noodle soup. I just got home, carrying hair products, birth control and a burrito in the same paper bag. I’m...
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Life is a *Hater*
Lately I’ve had to put an enormous amount of energy into not letting the haters affect my game. It’s unclear what I’ve even been doing with my life in the last month or so, but the struggle to remain...
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Renaissance or Something
I fired my therapist. She deserved it. I had originally hired her to help me through some of the stresses of moving to a new city, spending most of my time by myself, deciding the next move in my...
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Flashback Friday: Return to the Teen Scene
I don’t really remember much from my most recent trip to North Carolina, which is a shame since it was probably the last I’ll make for quite some time. It might be irrelevant now, but sitting here...
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’13 til infinity
“I wanna blog outside today!” I thought, after waking up at the crack of 12:30 to the smell of hot piss pouring through my window. One entire tube of SPF 100+ sunscreen in my eye, one makeshift...
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diamond in the back
I decided last weekend that the only way to follow ten straight workdays was to wage a full on-shit show, beginning with #ultravelvet @ passion lounge on thursday, @winston_filet’s birthday on friday,...
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bootleg luxury
After finishing my last day of regular work last week and entering the freelance/unemployment world for the rest of the summer, I decided to spend my paycheck on Life Improvement. I have been in a...
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